cheerful Mathematics

  nma.nadaf
  karma level 23799

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance


Smart man + dumb woman = affair 

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage 

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy


______________________________


OFFICE ARITHMETIC


Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee = production

Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

_____________________________


SHOPPING MATH


A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.

A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need. 

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GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS 


A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife 

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man. 

_____________________________ 


HAPPINESS


To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

______________________________ 


LONGEVITY


Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die

______________________________ 


PROPENSITY TO CHANGE


A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does. 

_____________________________


DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE


A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument


_____________________________


HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED 


Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.


SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO THE SMART GUYS YOU KNOW CAN HANDLE IT!

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