What Wife says and what she really means!

  panther
  karma level 70958

The wife says : You want
The wife means : You want

The wife says : We need
The wife means : I want



The wife says : Yes
The wife means : No

The wife says : No
The wife means : No

The wife says : Maybe
The wife means : No



The wife says : I'’m sorry
The wife means : You'’ll be sorry

The wife says : It’s your decision
The wife means : The correct decision should be obvious


The wife says : Do you like this recipe?
The wife means : You better get used to it


The wife says : Do what you want
The wife means : You’'ll pay for this later

The wife says : We need to talk
The wife means : I need to complain



The wife says : Sure… go ahead
The wife means : I don’t want you to

The wife says : I’n not upset
The wife means : Of course I’m upset you moron

The wife says : I’'ll be ready in a minute.
The wife means : Kick off your shoes and take an hour nap.

The wife says : Am I fat?
The wife means : Tell me I'’m beautiful.

The wife says : You have to learn to communicate.
The wife means : Just agree with me.

The wife says : This kitchen is so inconvenient
The wife means : I want a new house.

The wife says : I want new curtains.
The wife means : Also carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper!

The wife says : I need wedding shoes.
The wife means : The other forty pairs are the wrong shade of white.



The wife says : Hang the picture there
The wife means : No, I mean hang it there!

The wife says : I heard a noise
The wife means : I noticed you were almost asleep.

The wife says : Do you love me?
The wife means : I’m going to ask for something expensive.

The wife says : How much do you love me?
The wife means : I did something today you'’re not going to like.

The wife says : Are you listening to me?
The wife means : [Too late, you're doomed.]

The wife says : All we’re going to buy is a soap dish
The wife means : I'’m coming back with enough to fill this place.

The wife says : The same old thing.
The wife means : Nothing.

The wife says : Nothing.
The wife means : Everything.

The wife says : Nothing, really.
The wife means : It’s just that you’re an idiot.

The wife says : I don’t want to talk about it.
The wife means : I’m still building up steam.

The wife says : You’'re … so manly
The wife means : You need a shave and sweat a lot



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